so, over the last nine years, there's been a lot of porn i've made! it thrills me when people pay hard earned money to get my product. it validates me, and all my hard work, and all the time and trouble it took to make that product.
back when i first started, i got together with my BFFs and we shot each other with no experience, no education about photography, no really great equipment, but a lot of enthusiasm and love for what we were doing.
then over four years ago, i met someone who partnered with me, and he, throughout the years, invested thousands of dollars into photography equipment, paid for professional photography classes, and taught himself the art, yes, the ART of photography. i've been impressed over the years at his dedication and desire to better himself at his craft, his passion.
so i stepped the ante, as well.
i now rent expensive "porn palaces" by the week, send the owners a hefty security deposit (some are refundable, some aren't!), get a nail fill, pedicure, facial, eyebrow wax, hair cut, hair color, eyelash extensions (big mistake on that one and will never do that again), massage, dozens of new porn clothes, several new "fuck me heels", new sex toys, and spend hours upon hours sending out shoot information and scheduling time slots for the guys who want to shoot with me. plus time spent on social media letting people know about upcoming shoots if they'd like to shoot with us.
i also pay to fly my photographer/videographer/editor into vegas, round trip, and pay him a commission on all the hard work he does.
feeding people snacks and liquids and alcohol for 40 shoots can get quite pricey as well.
and for the first time, during my summer shoots in 2014, i had a paid bona fide hair design school graduate and make up artist fix me up every morning to make me camera ready.
the summer 2014 shoots in vegas literally cost me thousands of dollars. but i do this because i know that it will reap me a good return on my investment. i wouldn't do it otherwise. i consider myself a somewhat savvy business thinker, and while i am not always right, i do believe that it can take money to make money, and i do believe in consistently putting out a QUALITY product, because people will come back and buy more of your quality product.
how do you think it makes us porn workers feel, especially those who are independent and rely on sales to make a living, when we hear that people are seeing it for free on a porntube site? it can be demoralizing. i love my fans and members who email me with a link and let me know that they've found my porn on a porntube site so i can send those sites a DMCA to take it down. sorry, freeloaders, to spoil your fun, but you have no idea how much it cost to make that video. if you're going to post my porn for free, at least post my link so people know where to go to buy more. that's the least you can do.
i know our economy is in a sad state. i know that $15 is a lot of money to a lot of people. i know there are people who struggle paying their utilities and their rent or their mortgage or their car payment. gawd, add on child support, food, car insurance, heath insurance, taxes - we are being beaten down. but i feel like if someone has enough money for a smartphone or a laptop and an internet connection and the electricity to power it, they can save up $15 to buy a video.
when someone says to me, "i love the free photos you post, but i want to see the x-rated stuff," and i ask them to join my site, they say they can't afford it. if that's the truth, OK, i can accept that and understand that. but unless you are at a public library, using their computer, their electricity and their internet connection, i would think you can afford to buy a membership or video of mine.
a lot of you have followed me for years and know that i keep positive, avoid drama, and hate to complain. but when i spend LITERALLY THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS to bring you high quality porn, shot with professional HD equipment, professional lighting, by a man who has spent years perfecting his craft, editing it on state-of-the-art editing equipment, and i have taken hours and spent a ton of money before my shoots to prepare myself physically at the salon, not to mention all the planning and coordinating and scheduling and buying of new props, only to hear someone say it's not worth it, we'll go find it on a free site, i feel like i should speak up. because it's not just me. it is thousands of fellow amateur porn people who have the same thing happening to them.
so, please don't ever question why your favorite amateur porn actress disappeared and no longer is in the business. if you didn't support her in the most tangible way, by buying her product, most of us have no reason to stay.